Stupidity at its best ?


Dispatcher: Nine-one-one
Caller: Hi, is this the police?
Dispatcher: This is 911. Do you need police assistance?
Caller: Well, I don’t know who to call. Can you tell me how
to cook a turkey? I’ve never cooked one before.

Dispatcher: Nine-one-one What is the nature of your
emergency?
Caller: I’m trying to reach nine eleven but my phone
doesn’t have an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma’am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the
same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I’m not stupid.

Dispatcher: Nine-one-one What’s the nature of your
emergency?
Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only
two minutes apart.
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband.

Dispatcher: Nine-one-one
Caller: Yeah, I’m having trouble breathing. I’m all out
of breath. Darn…I think I’m going to pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?
Caller: I’m at a pay phone. North and Foster. Damn….
Dispatcher: Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an
asthmatic?
Caller: No
Dispatcher: What where you doing before you started having
trouble breathing?
Caller: Running from the police.
 
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